Ever wonder how some people can remain calm and collected while others are ticking time bombs under the exact same situation? That colleague or manager who takes his stress out on everyone else may get results, but at great cost to his team, the group moral and to his self-respect. We would all prefer to emulate the cool gurus, but just how do they engage others and foster respect?
Intangible qualities like emotional management skills are hard to set down in writing. If there was a secret formula we would have all cashed in years ago!
In the global context which is the 21st century, people are collaborating under diverse socio-cultural paradigms. Every experience is as unique as the two people that enter into the exchange. The variables which distinguish each unique interaction have three basic considerations:
1. How you perceive others?
2. How others perceive you?
3. How you perceive yourself?
Then, discover how well aligned those perceptions actually are? It may surprise you. Acknowledging your qualities and how these qualities serve your personal and professional goals is a critical part of the equation. You may see yourself as an honest and analytical individual, but your colleagues may interpret these same traits as abrupt and condescending… what now? Instead of taking the defensive stance, rather:
1. Start by taking time to process the message.
2. Try to remove the emotion- the catalyst to regretful words and actions.
3. Consider the reason behind the perceptual disconnect.
This takes practice, but practice teaches us how to get better at managing our emotions to our mutual advantage. The more you improve your emotional intelligence skills, the more you will defer stress and anxiety from the situation. In exchange, you nurture respect and admiration from others, as well as for yourself. It’s a skill that’s worth investing in.